Sunday, 15 March 2015

Kathryn's Inbox Exclusive: Old Lady Arrested For Harassing Teens on Bus

NOWHERESVILLE, AUSTRALIA--Mrs Edith Sparkles, age 73, was arrested and charged yesterday after harassing a group of teenagers on board a public bus. "I couldn't quite believe it," the bus driver, who works for Nowheresville Transit told one of our reporters. "The run started out just like any other. My first stop was just outside the local church, where I picked up a group of teenagers who all attend the church youth group and were on an outing together. My next stop was the retirement village to pick up Edith and that's when all hell broke loose."

"Mrs Sparkles has something of a reputation for criticising the behaviour of others on board the bus," a source who would rather remain anonymous told us. "Anyone who didn't purchase a ticket, who sat in the wheelchair access seat without just cause, who didn't stand up for the elderly or who put their feet up on the seats was always giving a sound telling off. We used to call her the Bus Nazi behind her back."

On the day in question, Mrs Sparkles climbed aboard the bus and immediately became distressed when she discovered that the group of teens were all seated toward the back of the bus and were quietly chatting among themselves. All wheelchair access seats were available, all tickets had been duly paid for and no one had their feet on the seats. At least three teenagers even offered Mrs Sparkles their seat, although there were still many seats available. "We all thought that she would be pleased," our source said. "But instead of basking in the utopia that she had fought so hard for, Mrs Sparkles seemed to become increasingly agitated and distressed. She began marching up and down the aisle, seemingly with a determination to find something wrong with at least one of her fellow passengers. She even began checking each of their shoelaces to see if they were tied properly."

The situation finally came to a head when the leader of the church youth group, Joshua Carpenter age 23, restrained Mrs Sparkles, thus preventing her from checking as to whether or not the members of the youth group were wearing singlets and if so, that they were tucked inside their underwear. "I find it disgusting that any member of the public would even attempt to interfere with one of the children who were under my supervision," Mr Carpenter explained. "The youngest ones are only twelve years old and were terrified."

Mrs Sparkles appeared gleeful as she began yelling at Mr Carpenter, telling him that he was a rude and disrespectful boy and that he ought to wash his mouth out with soap. At this point, the bus had pulled over to the side of the road and police were boarding, ready to arrest Mrs Sparkles. "This is an outrage," Mrs Sparkles was allegedly heard shouting, as police pulled her away. "An old lady cannot even travel alone on public transport anymore without someone trying to cause trouble ..."